A Different Perspective

Recently through an extended bout of malaria, I was forced to see things from a different perspective, namely from a position of weakness, utter dependence, and a rearrangement of daily priorities. I was forced back into the basics of existence, managing nausea, pain and weakness, forcing myself to eat and drink and sleeping lots! But along with this, since I didn't feel good enough to do anything, not even read, I was also given the opportunity to contemplate, meditate and pray. I often found my thoughts turning to others who are suffering, to the poor, to the helpless among us, and to the position of weakness.

Meanwhile things in the leadership training programs also seemed to be at a standstill.  Follow-up calls to the Diocese-based TEE programs weren't opening up to any further visits and although some groups affirmed that they were meeting and progressing, we couldn't tell how well and alive the program really was! The Bible college continued to struggle with inadequate funds, few students, and little movement toward resolution of the many faceted problems it is facing. In addition, we were feeling discouraged about the generally low state of spirituality in the churches and were asking ourselves and others in leadership, “What has happened?”

Missionaries aren't used to approaching their work from a position of weakness or powerlessness. Usually we find it in our power to manage, make things move, or persuade others to cooperate. But now God has brought us to a different perspective, that of working from a position of weakness. From this perspective, we realize our inadequacies, our inability to have answers, our absolute dependence on waiting for God to move, heal, and provide. And from this position, we sometimes must resign ourselves to give up Doing, and agree to just Be his children and his servants. When this happens, we tend to slow down and then are able to notice the small positive ways God is working in our lives and the lives of people around us. Things such as the training Joe was asked to give to 4 of the 5 students at the Bible college. In spite of the small number, their participation was good and they seem excited about being able to return home and form a study group of their own. Also, we have friendships with individuals who are sincerely seeking God’s way and are also concerned about the negative things in the churches. And we are refreshed by the joy on the faces of the children we see every day. God is teaching  us to recognize Him as our provider, healer and sustainer in every situation and to Be Thankful.    Gloria